Don't Get Me Wrong

I am in utter disbelief that Logan's first day of school is tomorrow. I understand that my baby has to grow up, that's why we take care of them right? To instill within them the virtues you hope he keeps when you are not at arms length. There are two boy hold overs from last year. One greeted me by telling me he killed a snake by throwing it on the ground and crushing its head. Oh joy! I looked at Logan and he was horrified. I made the mistake of telling the bundle of nerves husband. I thought he was going to take Logan and run! He is admittedly freaked out, he loves his little dude. He discovered how important we are to him, almost too late, but he did. Now he is in overly protective. I am fine with that, but I have to even it out with facts, he is ready to go, he can't stay home forever. Sure, both him and I are more than smart enough to home school, BUT he LOVES school, and the interactions he gets there.

My fears stem from someone trying to moles.t him or kill him. Irrational or normal, by the time I was at this point in my life both had occurred, it isn't happening to my kid, peroid! Sure I won't even let someone bring my kid to the bathroom when he was in preschool, and as of last night my irrationality was changed from stupidity, to good parenting. Lets be honest, most people call me to vent, ask advise, or cry. Fine. But, the call last night about tore my heart out. I have a darling friend who lives vicariously through her family member with no kids of her own she spoils her nieces and loved them like a mother. Last night she called me to ask advise on how to deal with the fact she discovered someone in their church had molested her niece for at least a month. Talk about a punch to the gut, just about to let my baby go and this happens to someone I know again. My heart goes out to the little girl, I commend the strength this little 5 year old had to say something. She showed more courage than I had at her age. As a Mother, I hope like hell that guy is killed, I have zero sympathy for that type of filth. As per my advise to said GF, I told her to not treat said child any different. She is reeling trying to deal with what is going on, don't make her talk. Tell her she is a very brave girl and just love her. But, it was a horrid reminder of why my child was never left alone with anyone, thus far in his life. In school there are bathrooms in every classroom, and noone is allowed to be alone with a child.

So yes,
i am scared about what is going to happen. I have kept him safe thus far and raised him the best I could. I have to let go, just a little and let him grow. Here is the first test on whether or not I have raised him right. I hope I did, guess I will find out soon! Intearnal doubts aside, I think he will do the right things when push comes to shove. That hard head, and overly quick thinking may serve a good purpose yet! Good luck BABY BOY!!